Daily Brief
A Fairy Tale of Bank Rate
2 minute readIt was Christmas Eve, babe
In the central bank
An old man said to me
Bank Rate will soon be 1
And then he rattled on
About a new black swan
And how inflation’s not
So transitory
Got out at half past one
And turned my phone back on
I started scrolling
And had a beer or two
So cross your fingers
I think that maybe
It will very soon be time
For more hikes to come through
There are bitcoins galore in deposits offshore
But the Bank says they’re dodgy and not worth the score
When the governor said that a rate hike’s ahead
He promised that profit was waiting for me
It was handsome, it was pretty
And the boys in the City
Lent me money for nothing
And tried to lend more
They thought the Old Lady
Was fickle and shady
And the rate hikes she promised
Would not come to light
The boys of the Bank’s MPC choir
Were getting in the way
But the drinks will sort them out
On Christmas day
This is dumb, this is bunk
This hike’s not a slam dunk
And the prospect ahead
Isn’t guaranteed bread
You chancer you braggart
You cheap lousy maggot
Happy Christmas; this farce might just cost us our jobs
The boys of the Bank’s MPC choir
Still getting in the way
But the drinks will sort them out
On Christmas day
I could have sold the pound
Well so could anyone
But it takes nerves of steel
To go long sterling
I paid my margin in
Built my position up
And with a bit of luck
I’ll have enough to treat you
With apologies to Jem Finer and Shane MacGowan
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